Bancuri
Un preot catolic, unul ortodox si un rabin discuta despre gestionarea banilor primiti de la credinciosi.
Preotul catolic:
- Eu am o metoda foarte eficienta. Trag o linie cu creta pe jos si arunc banii in aer. Ce cade in stanga e pentru Dumnezeu si Biserica, ce cade in dreapta e pentru mine.
Preotul ortodox:
- Eu desenez pe jos un cerc. Banii ii arunc in sus; ce cade in cerc e pentru Dumnezeu si Biserica, ce cade in afara e pentru mine.
Rabi:
- La mine e cel mai simplu. Eu arunc banii in sus. Dumnezeu opreste ce-i trebuie, ce cade inapoi e pentru rabi...
Preotul catolic:
- Eu am o metoda foarte eficienta. Trag o linie cu creta pe jos si arunc banii in aer. Ce cade in stanga e pentru Dumnezeu si Biserica, ce cade in dreapta e pentru mine.
Preotul ortodox:
- Eu desenez pe jos un cerc. Banii ii arunc in sus; ce cade in cerc e pentru Dumnezeu si Biserica, ce cade in afara e pentru mine.
Rabi:
- La mine e cel mai simplu. Eu arunc banii in sus. Dumnezeu opreste ce-i trebuie, ce cade inapoi e pentru rabi...
- R o b e r t
- EVO I
- Mesaje: 0
- Membru din: Dum Iul 22, 2007 10:13 pm
Cica antrenorul Olandei isi anunta jucatorii ca vor juca un meci contra Romaniei. Nimeni n-are chef, si la un moment dat portarul Van der Saar zice : - Baieti, uite ce zic eu. Joc eu singur contra Romaniei, si voi mergeti intr-un club, OK? Toti sunt de acord. La un moment dat aprind TV-ul si ce vad: 1-0 pentru Olanda, gol Van der Saar in minutul 5! Toti veseli, sting TV-ul si iar se pun pe baute... La capatul celor 90 de minute pornesc din nou televizorul si... "Romania 1 - Olanda 1, gol Mutu, minutul 90." Fuga toti la stadion si la vestiare il gasesc pe Van der Saar, disperat, cu capul in maini... - Ce s-a intamplat, mai Van der Saar? - Baieti, imi pare sincer rau, am fost eliminat in minutul 6 ...
-Bai francezule ce faceti voi cu fructele dupa ce le
stoarceti si obtineti sucul?
-Le aruncam.
-Noi americanii nu facem asa ceva.
Luam ce a mai ramas din fructe le punem intr-un container special transformam totul in gem de fructe, umplem croissantele cu acest gem si apoi le vindem in Franta.
-Ia spune, mai americanule , voi ce faceti cu prezervativele dupa ce le folositi?
-Le aruncam, of course.
-Uite, noi francezii nu facem asa ceva.Luam toate prezervativele folosite, le punem intr-un container special, le reciclam, transformam totul in guma de mestecat si apoi le vindem in America!
stoarceti si obtineti sucul?
-Le aruncam.
-Noi americanii nu facem asa ceva.
Luam ce a mai ramas din fructe le punem intr-un container special transformam totul in gem de fructe, umplem croissantele cu acest gem si apoi le vindem in Franta.
-Ia spune, mai americanule , voi ce faceti cu prezervativele dupa ce le folositi?
-Le aruncam, of course.
-Uite, noi francezii nu facem asa ceva.Luam toate prezervativele folosite, le punem intr-un container special, le reciclam, transformam totul in guma de mestecat si apoi le vindem in America!
1 I am currently out at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the position. Be prepared for my mood.
2 You are receiving this automatic notification because I am out of the office. If I was in, chances are you wouldn’t have received anything at all.
3 I will be unable to delete all the unread, worthless emails you send me until I return from holiday on 23.08.2007 . Please be patient and your mail will be deleted in the order it was received.
4 Thank you for your email. Your credit card has been charged $5.99 for the first ten words and $1.99 for each additional word in your message.
5 The e-mail server is unable to verify your server connection and is unable to deliver this message. Please restart your computer and try pending again. (The beauty of this is that when you return, you can see how many in-duh-viduals did this over and over).
6 Thank you for your message, which has been added to a queuing system. You are currently in 352nd place, and can expect to receive a reply in approximately 19 weeks.
7 I will be out of the office for the next two weeks for medical reasons. When I return, please refer to me as ‘Margaret’ instead of ‘Dave’
SCUZE, dar daca le traduc nu mai au acelasi farmec...
2 You are receiving this automatic notification because I am out of the office. If I was in, chances are you wouldn’t have received anything at all.
3 I will be unable to delete all the unread, worthless emails you send me until I return from holiday on 23.08.2007 . Please be patient and your mail will be deleted in the order it was received.
4 Thank you for your email. Your credit card has been charged $5.99 for the first ten words and $1.99 for each additional word in your message.
5 The e-mail server is unable to verify your server connection and is unable to deliver this message. Please restart your computer and try pending again. (The beauty of this is that when you return, you can see how many in-duh-viduals did this over and over).
6 Thank you for your message, which has been added to a queuing system. You are currently in 352nd place, and can expect to receive a reply in approximately 19 weeks.
7 I will be out of the office for the next two weeks for medical reasons. When I return, please refer to me as ‘Margaret’ instead of ‘Dave’
SCUZE, dar daca le traduc nu mai au acelasi farmec...
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